amandaisbrootal

Everything was supposed to change with me and my husband after we got married, but it hasn’t he still pays more attention to the computer and Tv than he does me…  If I suggest something he ignores me…   Im just bored with it…

I’m not sure what to do about this… in fact I think I will just sleep it off… but I know that it will be the same thing tomorrow…

When I was 13 I had a highschool boyfriend. he was 14, and we were together for 3 years, He was killed 3 days before our graduation.  They said it was suicide so it hurt even more, when I thought it was my fault. So I basically would eat myself to sleep everyday, I never left or did any kind of activity, I gained about 40 lbs in about 3 months, Then I met my husband, and he just made me feel so awesome about myself, but I got very comfortable, basically I would walk everywhere but I didnt do much else, I gained about 10 lbs. Then we move in with each other after about a year, 15 more lbs.  We have a miscarriage on August 31st 2007,  We went to the WEBN fireworks in Cincinnati and basically my husbands father showed his true colors by getting very drunk and very stubborn , so we refuse to take him anywhere,   He drinks and he is always on something. I gained so much weight from the miscarriage because We were trying for a baby, so thats 46 more lbs. Shortly after that I had alot of depression and anixety, gaining about 22 lbs from being to scared to do activity.  Then laziness stepped in, and I gained about 14 lbs.  In Febuary my husband became a personal trainer and I joined the gym he was working at, I started loosing weight and eating healthier, I lost 22 lbs.

that went on until my sister moved in with us in April  and she was on the depo shot for Birth control which caused we to not have a period. so I gained alot of weight.  31 lbs. :(   My sister moved out about 2 weeks after she moved in. But my period didnt come until July 12th. My doctor said it was stress and it would regulate it’s self.  On May 25th 2008, My husband and I were out with two of our other friends and we did our usual weekend trip lol!  Denny’s, Starbucks, wal-mart, when we were on our way home our friend swerved to miss to cyotes in the road and when she did she accidently hit the gas instead of the break swerving out of control and flipping 3 1/2 times into a ditch. None of us were drinking, we were basically just coming home… but I ended up in the hospital with a head injury, I also had bruised kidneys, ( the Metal rods used to make fencing came in through my door, and bascially I was lucky we didnt flip on more time, because it would of went all the way through my side, I also had on about 5 inches away from my head.  since I was supposed to rest, I ended up over resting and over eating.

I want to do this for my husband,  I want to be able to proudly wear a bathing suit, and I want to be healthy for my nephews and my future children. But the main reason is that I want to feel beautiful, I want  to be able to run up and down stairs and not be stopped by heavy breathing…  I want the strength to be able to loose all of this weight, I will do it!

My name is Amanda! I weigh 252 lbs. I’m 20 yearsold and I have been struggling for over 3 years to loose weight, I dont have alot of friends and I think the lack of support or interest from them  is why I failed so many times before. I’m hoping to loose 10 lbs. by august 23rd. I know it’s a big jump but even If I can loose 8 lbs I will know I’m doing good. I don’t eat often, and when I do eat I over indulge. I’m a newly-wed I got married to the love of my life on June 27th 2008. My husband loves me how I am, but he is also a personal trainer.  So he works out alot, and I have had a gym membership since Febuary, but I have only went like 2 or 3 months and then I was in a car accident resulting in a head injury and I was unable to workout for a few months. So I’m hoping that maybe I can meet some new friends and create a maintain healthier life-style.